So, you have the fear that your husband might be cheating on you. You are not able to find the obvious clues (lipstick or perfume on the shirt, credit card receipt for dinner for two, not coming home until late night, etc.) but you feel that something is not right. The communication between the two of you has dwindled and every night together feels off. “Is my husband cheating?”, you ask yourself. You are most likely also wondering if you should do anything to hopefully prove yourself wrong. This is only a question that you can answer. Finding out that your husband is cheating would be a huge heartbreak to you, but would also ease your mind in knowing the truth. As we all know, the truth can sometimes be hurtful.
All About Communication
It is always good that you ry to practice an open communication marriage. There should never be anything that you two should hide from each other. Since you are reading this article, the truth is that this is not part of your relationship. Start by trying to fix this issue. Consider asking your husband to go seek professional assistance in opening the lines of communication.
If you have already tried this path, here are a few suggestions to get you on the right track towards the truth.
Love Truly Does Blind People
The first thing you need to keep in your head is that you are most likely blinded by love. This will make it harder for you to see the reality; no one wants to face the fact that the love of their life is going outside your marriage to find “excitement”. The easiest place to start finding the truth about the possibility your husband is cheating on you is from your mutual friends. Your friends can confirm to you if your husband’s personality has changed at all. Husbands, with a conscious at least, will be more cautious about what they talk about, when they answer they cell phone, or even simple things like making sure you call your wife by the right name. Sometimes they might even tell their best friend. If you are good friends with their best friend’s wife, this is a great source of knowledge.
Next you should work on keeping a log. This log will track everything your husband does. Consider keeping time on their daily routine. Here are a few suggestions:
- What time do they wake up
- What time do they leave to go to work
- If your husband uses instant messenger at work, keep an eye on the time he logs on from work
- Always ask where he went for lunch, what he ate and who went with
- Try to ask your husband to let you know when he leaves work
- Also mark down what time he makes it home
With this knowledge documented, you can see if there are huge lags between when he gets to work or the time it takes for him to get home. MapQuest the trip from your house to their job and compare the difference between the times it should take get there, or home, to the time they actually took. Obviously, if there is too much of a difference, this could be a chance for him to be somewhere else.
Another great, already made log, is the cell phone bill. Most companies allow you to log on and get a copy of all outgoing and incoming numbers. Check often repeated numbers with a Google search and see if you can find the owner. You can also ask a friend of yours to call it and see if they can find out who answers.
If you think of other logs that could be kept to help catch a cheating husband, please comment below.
Caught on Tape?
Invest in a extra capacity, digital, voice recorder that is voice activated. Get some duct tape and inconspicuously place it under you husband’s dashboard. Since almost everyone has a cell phone nowadays, the car is the perfect place for your cheating husband to hold incriminating conversations.
Nothing is working, but something is definitely wrong. It is eating you up inside and you want absolute confirmation that hopefully you are insane for thinking your husband is cheating. It’s time to hire a private investigator. Private investigators will have the time, and the undercover factor, to catch your cheating husband. Their job is to shadow your husband and take pictures, or video, of anything and everything they do. Since your husband has no idea who this person is (some companies will have more than one person shadowing to keep the suspect from finding out) they will continue to do their normal daily activities, which in most cases will lead to the scene of the crime. There are a few things you should consider when picking a private investigator company:
- The best thing you can do is try to find a referral from someone you know. Of course be careful to ask the right people, as the wrong person will tell your husband of your intentions.
- There are membership directories that will confirm you are dealing with a professional company. For example, The National Association of Legal Investigators (NALI).
- Some states require private investigators to be licensed. Check with your State if this is correct and use it to your advantage.
- Ask them to provide school backgrounds. Detective’s training and a law background should be a must.
If there are any other plans that have worked for you, please share with the community by registering and leaving a comment for others to benefit from.