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Is my spouse cheating?

Don't Guess.

Know
Who‘s a Cheater

Protect Your Marriage

One common statement made by someone who committed adultery is that it wasn't planned, "it just happened." Adultery doesn't just happen. There are steps that are taken by two people who desire to be together. The way in which a husband and wife can prevent falling into the trap of adultery is by taking the following steps.

  • A big mistake is when a person says, "I would never do that." Never assume you are so righteous or self-controlled that you could never do such a thing. Instead, you need to think it can happen to you.
  • If your needs are going unmet, you seriously need to tell your spouse. Get marital counseling. Otherwise, it is almost sure you will end up having an affair.
  • Conduct yourself properly at all times in an upright manner.
  • The second you find yourself thinking a person is attractive, run like hell. Do everything you can to NOT be around that person, especially alone.
  • Watch what you say and do because there are consequences to our actions. Words can be misconstrued or even taken out of context. Actions can be misinterpreted. Don't flirt with someone other than your spouse. That sends a clear message that you are not happy in your marriage.
  • If you are hanging around with too many singles, chances are you will be tempted to cheat on your spouse. Try to avoid hanging out with singles or with people that are having affairs. Hang out with married couples, especially ones that have a good marriage.
  • It is okay to have acquaintances of the opposite sex. However, men should not have female friends that they hang out with. Likewise, women should not be hanging out with other men. Your best friend should be your spouse, not the girl/guy next door or at the job.
  • Do not ride alone with the opposite sex in a car (especially when that person is attractive), definitely not at night.
  • Intimacy occurs when two people spend a lot of time together and share each other's problems and secrets. Do not tell your problems to someone of the opposite sex (especially an attractive one). This creates intimacy, which always leads to other things. Never share marital problems with the hottie at your job.
  • Do not accept greeting cards or gifts from someone you find attractive or someone you think is attracted to you.
  • Wear your wedding ring. Although nowadays people rarely care that you are married, it is still a good idea to wear it.
  • Think "consequences." What if I do this thing, will my spouse be bothered by it? Will my marriage be affected by it?
  • If you attend school, as many adults do now, do not study with someone of the opposite sex. Men need to find a man to study with or to call for information. Women need to find another woman.
  • Do not hug or kiss the (attractive) opposite sex. This is too risky.
  • Do not allow the opposite sex to visit your home if you are alone.
  • Respect and honor your spouse. Do not belittle, mock, curse, be sarcastic, call names, accuse falsely, physically hit, yell at, deceive and lie to one another. Do not put down your spouse in public (or private). It causes shame, embarrassment and low self-esteem. Do not take your spouse for granted.
  • If your spouse asks you to disconnect yourself from a certain person, you ought to respect their wishes and do so. It has nothing to do with them trying to control you. It has to do with them trying to prevent adultery.
  • Be accountable to your spouse and to a trusted friend. Do not complain that you feel like you have no privacy. Privacy is what leads people to have affairs. Be an open book. With today's technology, every person has their own cell phone and their own computer. This opens a tremendous door for a spouse to cheat because of the "privacy" they have. Let your spouse know all the passwords to everything you have.

This list may sound a bit harsh and it goes against the grain but it will prevent you from committing adultery. Keep open communication with your spouse. Always be willing to share what bothers you. Always keep trying to make the marriage better. Always look for ways to keep the marriage fresh.

Source: http://ezinearticles.com/?Preventing-Adultery---Protect-Your-Marriage&id=1289660